Month: July 2024

On March 26th 2014, I had the honour to be present at Band From Utopia’s sound check in De Boerderij, Zoetermeer. It was a dream come true. Several days prior, I interviewed Robert (Bobby) Martin over the phone (as I was working for a internet radio station, Maxazine, to write something about the band – as a huge Zappa fan, this was too, an absolute honour. After the interview, Robert told me I could be there at the sound check. And that was something like nothing else I had ever experienced!

I got to meet, and talk to, all my heroes: Chad Wackerman, Albert Wing, Robert (Bobby) Martin, Ed Mann, Ray White, Arthur Barrow. I brought my (vinyl) copy of Them Or Us and they all signed it. It’s been hanging on the wall of The Yellow Hippo Studios ever since. I look at it every day, and think of that amazing evening. For not only was I present at the sound check, the concert that evening was superb! I even managed to get my hands on a huge announcement poster (which is now hanging in my living room).

When the sad news of Ed Mann’s passing reached me, looking at the poster and the album, looking at the signed album on my wall made me sad. For not only was I present at the 2014 sound check … I also had the privilege to meet these amazing musicians again, in the years that followed. And not only that! For less than a year after this sound check, I was playing keyboards at Zappanale with ZAPPATiKA – joined on stage by Ed Mann, Denny Walley, Jeff Hollie, Craig Twister Steward and Ike Willis. A memory I have visited every day since.

Ed Mann passed away on May 31st …. and now, on July 2nd, I, in silence had to say goodbye to Tom Fowler.

What all can happen in just 10 years. In one year. In a day. My signed copy of Them of Us is, of course, still on my wall in my studio and I see their autographs several times a day. And although it makes me very sad looking at them and reminiscing the moment these autographs were given to me, I feel blessed for having known them, that our paths crossed because of the music and life of Frank Zappa.

No greater honour could have befallen me.

Life, and music goes on. We live, enjoy, party, go nuts, do stupid things, celebrate, grieve, laugh and cry … and at the center of all that, there is music.

And that’s what holds it all together.

But it hurts still, when a friend exits the stage for the last time.

Thank you, for all things beautiful, Ed Mann and Tom Fowler. May you rest in peace.

 

a parabel

When he moved to the new city, a place he had never been before but where he intended to stay indefinitely, something unexpected happened on his first day of shopping: he fell in love.

After buying his groceries, mostly beer and frozen pizza, although he did get some apples, toothpicks, a small cake and half a loaf of sliced bread, he absentmindedly passed a small flower stall, just at the exit of the supermarket. He would’ve passed it without giving it a second look, when he heard a firm, but ever so lovely voice say: “thank you, you have a nice day now.” He looked up at the source of this and laid eyes on the beautiful lady.

He was not really into buying flowers, but he decided to buy a small bouquet. A more than good excuse to get a bit closer to the lovely lady selling the flowers.

He didn’t have the nerve to say anything more than “thank you” and “have a good day” as he paid.

Back home, the flowers eventually wilted away on the kitchen table, still in their cellophane wrapper.

As weeks turned into months and then years, he occasionally visited the flower shop to buy a small bouquet, always with the intention of saying, as soon as he paid for them, “These are for you.” But he never dared to do so. Instead, he took them home, sometimes giving them away to someone on the street, or forgetting them at the bottom of a drawer, where they would rot. Whenever that happened, he told himself: “better bin them as soon as I get home, next time.” But, as with so many things, he would forget. And, occasionally, when he felt like it, he would put them in a vase.

In his mind, he had already composed several letters and even poems to the lady at the flower shop, telling her that he had been silently in love with her ever since the first day he saw her.

Every time he went shopping, they would greet each other warmly, but they never exchanged more than a few words.

Then, about 17 years later, now successful in his career, he decided enough time had passed. He resolved to visit the little flower stall again and buy a large bouquet of beautiful flowers to give to the lady whose name he had never learned all these years.

Feeling somewhat nervous, he once again approached the goal of his mission and saw a beautiful bouquet arranged with red roses, green leaves, and small white flowers whose names he didn’t know. It looked expensive enough, so he chose it.

Carefully, he took the bouquet out of the bucket it was standing out, a couple feet from the register, and handed it to the lady, already expecting her to be very surprised when he would tell her they were for her.

“Are these a gift?” the lady smiled.

“Yes,” he replied timidly.

The lady wrapped the flowers with an abundance of ribbons and handed them back to him.

For a few moments, they stood in silence, and he just smiled at her. Then she asked, “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

Feeling his heart race, he felt the blood rushing to his head and his knees trembling. He wanted to walk away, as he had done so many times before, but almost inaudibly he said to her, “These are for you.”

At first, it seemed she hadn’t heard him, but then she blushed.

“That is very kind of you, sir,” she said. The ice was broken. He replied, “I’ve wanted to do this ever since I first saw you.”

“I have no other intention than giving you these flowers,” he quickly added, “just to show my appreciation for a lovely woman.”

“Have a nice day,” he said quickly, afraid of what she would say and he turned around, wanting to go home.

And as he began to walk away, the lady said, “Excuse me, sir?” Just before he turned back around, his mind raced with everything that could happen next.

His world spun around. The actual world was spinning around. “Faster than it should,” he thought. Then, nothing spun anymore and all was black and silent. He heard a thud, for some reason he knew that that was his body hitting the sidewalk. He did not feel it. He was not in pain. Not afraid. All was well.